Doug Smith

What can one say about Doug Smith? Not a whole heck of a lot, quite honestly. Like … um … oh, I don’t know. He drinks like a fish … lives with his partner in Door County, Wisconsin … and … um … I think that pretty much sums it up.

At any rate, at the age of 19, Doug had a dose of inspiration and stole an idea for a website from a friend of his. He then proceeded to steal HTML and graphics from other friends and, thus, Doogie’s 5-Yak Reviews was born! Doug is now 27, has a full time job in a local bank and maintains this site. What with all that comes with being webmaster, editor, head writer and creator, Doug spends most of his spare time sitting in front his computer, gulping down as much coffee (or Captain Morgan and Coke) as he can before he starts shaking violently (or passes out).

Doug is a huge fan of “Mystery Science Theater 3000.” Like his friend and colleague Butch Miller says, “If you’re incapable of being a fan of SOMETHING, then you just aren’t equipped to have fans yourself.”

What are some of his favorite movies? Well, “Ghostbusters” ranks way up there, as does “Monty Python and the Holy Grail.” Just going by those two, you can get a pretty good idea of just what kind of guy Doug is.

That’s pretty much all there is. Doug hopes you enjoy your visit, and that you come back as often as you see fit. If you have any questions at all, feel free to ask.

Butch Miller

Butch Miller was born on the same day that John Lennon and Yoko Ono stood naked atop the Empire State Building and declared it day one of year one. And if that doesn’t give you a glimpse into his psyche, then count your lucky stars, because he can’t make heads or tails of it himself. If that isn’t enough info, then here’s more: he was born as an Aquarian in 1970. Of that, make what you will.

He’s a father, husband, writer, former professional musician (six and twelve electric and acoustic, and also did some bass gigs for cash), former process cameraman/platemaker/litho stripper, amateur scientist, and just your all around faux-nouveau renaissance man. Once he started a religion based on a tree-stump carved into the form of a mushroom.

His favorite movies: This is Spinal Tap, A Clockwork Orange, Highlander (Yes, Highlander, if you don’t like it then tough titties), They Call Me Trinity, Urosutkidoji: Legend of the Overfiend, Taxi Driver, Pulp Fiction, Orgy of the Dead, Plan 9 From Outer Space, Ed Wood, Conan the Barbarian, Night of the Living Dead, Freaks, Cemetery Man, Cat People, Happy Gilmore, The Wall, Monty Python and the Holy Grail (for a start …)

Butch can be reached via email at

John Sizemore and Pat Dettellis

John Sizemore and Pat Dettellis have been called the “Siskel and Ebert” of Doogie’s 5-Yak Reviews (John being the hairier, non-dead Siskel). Having met and dated online before finally deciding to marry out of necessity (no one else could stand having them around overnight), they have a natural antipathy towards people in general and each other in particular. Born and bred in Maryland and New Jersey respectively, they now live midway between in-laws, somewhere deep in the mountains of northern Pennsylvania.

John and Pat can be reached via email at